Hello everyone, this might actually be a long read, but it’s worth it has I would really need your advice no matter how small.
I’m the 5th child out of 6 children in my family(4 girls and 2 boys) and I’m 24.
My elder bro who happens to be my most senior sibling (first child) is 32, and he has a 26-year-old fiancée.
I used to have a very big problem guys, with women actually.
This stemmed from the fact that for some very weird reason, girls almost always adore me to the dangerous point of making it very easy for me to sleep with them even without spending much.
I was addicted to sex and women in general because of that.
My brother has always stayed in his own house since he was 26.
He is really comfortable with a very good job plus he runs a successful business. I’ve been staying with him since I was 16.
We used to be really wayward. I followed him everywhere. Parties, clubs, bars, you name it, we represented.
He funded my stupid lifestyle, I even lost my virginity at 17 when he paid a girl to sleep with me. This was the very beginning of my obsession.
At 21, my body count was already over 30, and I had already slept with 2 of his very serious girlfriends (which they initiated actually) without him knowing.
I was actually in over my head then and the excitement made me do them without thinking.
Probably due to the fact that I’ve always envied my brother’s very masculine physique and looks.
I have very dark periorbital circles around my eyes and thick brows which always made me look more feminine than masculine till I was able to hide it with a beard, so it came as a huge feat to be able to bed his girlfriends at the very least, to me.
I got caught though with the 2nd who he actually had marriage plans for.
He intercepted a text she sent to me and all hell was let loose. A family meeting was held, my mum and entire family were so mad at me.
My eldest sister slapped me to kingdom come. I had to kneel and begged in tears for him and everyone to forgive me which he did to my surprise.
He forgave me wholeheartedly. He never chased me away from his home till I left for service July last year to Abuja.
During this period, he met and engaged his current fiancée.
I came back from Abuja in August this year and met her here. I almost didn’t approve of her cause of her slay queen kinda dress style and looks, but we got along so well almost immediately.
Then I started noticing some weird behaviours 2 months back.
I was asleep one afternoon when my brother was at work and woke up to find his fiancée kneeling beside my bed, staring at my face.
I almost screamed, but I recognized her in time, and she started laughing so I took it as a joke.
It happened again about a week later but this time around, I pretended to be asleep and knew when she walked into my room and I felt her staring into my face for some minutes till she got up and left.
I got so scared of her because i started thinking she was a witch or something.
My brother travelled about 3 weeks ago, and she was always walking around the house with a towel that revealed most of her laps.
It made me very uneasy and scared. One day she came into my room to take movies from my laptop with the same towel.
All the while she was sitting in front of me, I could see her vagina clearly, but I pretended and was sweating profusely.
She acted like she was oblivious though. When she got up to leave, her towel dropped and she was stark naked in front of me.
She screamed and acted like it was a mistake, but my guts keep telling me it wasn’t.
I almost grabbed her I wouldn’t lie but the fear of my family is bigger than any urge out there. They’ll fry me and hang me out to dry.
She gives me intense stares whenever she talks to me almost like she wants to set me on fire with her eyes and right now guys I’m really scared of repeating what almost destroyed the relationship I had with my brother.
I really don’t know what to do. I’m thinking of moving back to my family house but when I brought it up to my brother, he wasn’t having any of it.
He blatantly refused and said he was working on getting me a job somewhere so he needs me close.
Should i mention he is also planning on sending me to Canada for my masters.
I’m also thinking of opening up to him but I feel like there isn’t enough to accuse her and I might just end up re-opening old wounds with such accusations.
I’m at crossroads hear folks, I feel scared of going out of my room these days, I can’t even look her in the eyes for more than a second and she seems to enjoy it (probably thinking she is intimidating me with her beauty) but I’m just really scared.
I need matured advice please and if you can’t give any, you’re better off not commenting..
I’m trying to be a good person my family will be proud of in the future, and I’ve come a long way in beating my sexual addictions.